Occasionally, I receive an email or a comment that questions my integrity or my drive. Some people still question my resolve. So, with a video and a couple of paragraphs, I will respond as such:
The most inspirational mash-up that I have seen in a long time. And I believe every word of it. And I will become what I know I am, not because I dream but because I will it so. You don’t see my every day life but just know that while you may remember the worst, I am cracking that ceiling bit by bit, day by day. It is not in me to fail. It is in me to stumble, fall, trip and occasionally break. But I never fail. Failure only occurs when you consider a stumble, fall, trip or breakdown as an indefinite tarnish. I will keep chipping away and chipping away with my able body and stout mind.
“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows…life will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much can you take and keep moving forward?”
I am more motivated than I have ever been. Like my mother once told me, speak it into existence. So here I am. This is what is on my mind and I plan on seeing it through to the very end. Please don’t think that I will ever give up because I never will. I don’t know how to give up.
Look at one of the most recent comments. The title of this blog is a phrase that always used to fire me up for success. Now it just seems antiquated, even when my father relates it to my fight for vindication. Who do you think of when you see this pictured t-shirt? Ali? President Obama? Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson?
The lead attorney for my appeal, Ron Machen, was officially tapped by President Obama to fill the role of D.C.’s U.S. Attorney. (See Here: Machen tapped U.S. Attorney for D.C.) The Court of Appeals for the Armed Forces is likely my last shot at vindication as Machen’s departure will leave one brilliant, knowledgeable and personable attorney, Daniel Volchok, as my lone representative from Wilmer Hale, L.L.P.
It has been nearly a month and a half since I stood before the judges and I don’t expect any word any time soon. I don’t get anxious and I surely don’t worry. I have learned, in the past four years, that fighting for a particular goal, scratching and clawing to get there, isn’t always the best solution. I want to practice law. I want to envision and engineer the social landscape of the future. At the same time, I know that I would much rather be a successful human being (Christian, father, husband, etc) than to kill myself trying to overcome a formidable obstacle (being licensed) and burning myself out. In the end, social change is about influence and the employment of vast resources.
Education is a key to unlocking the potential in an individual but it is just one possible ingredient for success. In these four years, I have learned that resources, influence and well-being are just as important. In my post-collegiate career, I have worked alongside of two older, highly-educated black men. Both had their Master’s degrees. Both felt that they could change the world with their education and neither are. This beg’s the question, is education really important? Especially as a black man. We live in a world of monster.com and craigslist.com and in this world, people really believe that they have a shot at meaningful employment and a path to greatness. Rather, the free enterprise isn’t so free. Whether you are of an aristocratic pedigree or a beneficiary of affirmative action, it is more about interpersonal connections and circumstance than education. I wonder if they learned this before or after they graduated with their master’s degrees?
I want my graduate education, and I plan on earning it, but it won’t change my life. I am aware of that. Highly-educated black men are like German-engineered super cars without the Autobahn to test their limits. So the true question is, should we really fight until we win? Lose our minds, families and our optimism? More often than not, black men fight until theylose.
This may seem like a solemn message but I have been doing a lot of reading lately. Malcolm Gladwell’s books (Outliers, Tipping Point, Blink), 50 Cent’s The 50th Law (which is rather genius) and other books of the sort. Some black men make it. Obama, Machen, Holder, Bob Johnson, Cornel West, and Jack White (See: On Being a Black Lawyer). Education is metamorphosis. It is possible that education does more harm than good for the ambitious black man and the people who look up to them. How deadening is it to see a highly-educated black man doing a job that anyone can do. It is the story of the 20th century and it hasnt gotten much better. I am just going to work hard, sleep little, practice much and carve my own path. Because many of the “German-engineered super cars” that I have known, never find their Autobahn. I rather take my own road.
Who do you think of when you see this pictured t-shirt? Ali? President Obama? Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson?